Court Date

Kayla had her first ever court date today. Heck it was my first ever as well for that matter. I promised you all I would tell you what all that was about today, so here goes...

A while ago, Kayla was dating this guy. This boy had been in trouble before, even been arrested several times. She's of course not seeing him now. Back when they were dating there was a fight that broke out at school. This guy got really mad at some other kids. According to Kayla, he got REALLY upset and was physically and verbally worked up. Well, Kayla said she 'held him back' and didn't let him hit this boy. The school officials came over, as well as the school police officer. The boy got really upset and very disrespectful with the police officer. Kayla said he puffed up his chest 'as if he was going to do something to the cop' -- and that he was literally centimeters from his face -- but that he didn't actually TOUCH the police officer.

Well, the boy got arrested for the whole thing. Today was his trial and Kayla was called in to testify on behalf of the defense. She was called in to say that the kid didn't touch the police officer, which contradicts the testimony of all the school officials as well as the police officer.

I was really afraid they were going to come down on her pretty hard today. That they were going to make her trip over her words... mix up her story... catch her in a lie... or something. But it ended up being okay.

They did get her to mix up one thing - which probably completely voided most of her testimony anyways. She told the defender that she was NEXT to the police officer and her boyfriend the whole time, so she could clearly see that at no time did her boyfriend put his hands on the cop. But when the prosecutor cross examined her, she said: "So, you were saying that you were standing behind the police officer, correct?" And Kayla responded: "Yes." And the attorney responded again with: "And then you walked around and stood next to your boyfriend?" Kayla said: "Yes, that's right." I saw the boy's mom sitting there, crossing her arms, getting very uncomfortable and upset. I immediately knew Kayla had been worked into saying something that wasn't correct, for their benefit.

Of course, the prosecutor ended Kayla's session with: "So, he was your ex-boyfriend you said? Is that correct?" Kayla said yes. And she said, "But, you don't really want to see him get into any trouble, now - do you?" Kayla said, "well, of course not." But it was the WAY she said it.... that you knew that she meant that Kayla was talking to try to keep her friend out of trouble. Jeez.

So, that's how I spent much of my day today. Tons of fun there, huh?

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I'm really worried about Julie's upcoming move. I'm afraid she's not going to be ready for the move. Mom and Katie keep telling me not to expect Julie to do anything -- to just go over there and that we should all go do everything FOR her.

But -- dag-nabbit -- I don't wanna. She's home most of the time... she has time to sit out by the pool all ding-dang day and work on her tan.... why shouldn't she be expected to pack her own boxes?

I know she's never moved before all by herself. I get that. She's always had someone else do all the moving for her (moving companies). But -- heck, if I told Jonathan, who is 15, that he was moving from here to his Aunt Katie's house and he needed to pack everything he needed to live in a box - I'm betting he'd do it just fine.

I know Julie can do this. She's moving into a 2 room apartment for goodness sake, how hard could THAT be? I would think it would be harder to sell the things that she's NOT bringing with her, and that she has been doing - or at least I think she has been doing anyways.

I don't know, I'm just a bit worried about it. Moving date is end of the month next month -- after Amanda's birthday, Kayte's birthday, Justin's birthday and father's day. It'll be a busy month!

I should run, I just wanted to post a quick blog to let you know about the court thing today with Kayla. As promised... more soon as I have much to catch you up on.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers. Thank you

Loooooooong Time No Blog

I know it's been a long time since my last blog. Soooooo much has gone on, I'm sure so many of you, even those of you who are with me all the time wonder what the HECK is going on. I know, I know.

Many of you have asked if 'just nothing is going on' because I'm not blogging. That wouldn't be true. In fact, tons of stuff has gone on. But the computer a friend from church who was generous enough from church to give us is again full of Trojan viruses ~ love kids! Even with virus protection, it got in. Chris keeps trying to clean it, but we can't get rid of it. Not yet anyways.

The laptop, the only other computer we have which we've told the kids they can 'use' but not really put anything on as far as downloading on or anything because the laptop is completely full as far as space on the hard-drive. We have told them this, sat them down - shown them how full it was - explained it was Chris's 'work' computer and not to put stuff on it. Yet, we keep finding pictures and stuff that the kids keep putting on the hard drive. Their friends........ lunch pictures............... pictures of them in the bathroom..... with their friends....... with their bathing suits..... etc...... just kills me. Of course, it too had a Trojan but we managed to remove it off the laptop. I just find it very difficult to use this laptop for several reasons... the touch pad is very sensitive.... it's hard drive is full... so much on it doesn't work, from the CD drive not opening anymore to the power cord not plugging in. I've blogged before about this one "limping along".

Anyways.... with Mr. Bush's tax stimulus check received last week, I decided to go to Sam's club and get an inexpensive laptop. A small one that Chris and I can use - NOT the kids. E-V-E-R. We didn't get a docking station, it's not going to go into the office, it's just something that Chris and I can use for our own personal use (well, Chris for business use of course). Sweet, huh?

So.... with computer on my lap - let's get down to business, shall we?

Things here are pretty good - and sometimes bad - just as usual, huh?

On the good side, the kids have dong a phenomenal job in school. There is a darn good chance -- like maybe as much as a 95% probability - that all three of Julie's kids are going to have honor roll this last 9 weeks. Jonathan, we believe, is going to have all A's and B's and only 1 C. This is just... unreal. We had NO IDEA that this could really happen. The problem is that we promised the kids if they got honor roll that they could have something they wanted as a reward. All the kids have wanted cell phones. We are going to be a cell phone family, let me tell ya. We are going to have to either get two plans (maximum number of phones you can have on one plan is 5, so we can't have 6 without adding a whole other plan) -- or we might have a friend add Justin to her cell plan as that would be easier.

Justin's grades have just gone WAY UP since getting on his new medication. It's amazing to see the difference that little pill has made. It hasn't changed anything in his personality or anything about him in any way other than in his ability to focus at school.

Kayla and I are still having 'issues'. Tonight we had another big talk. It started because she wanted to go to a different school. The same school that her boyfriend goes to. It's a technical 'career' school. She started off the conversation saying that she wanted to go because it was close to her mom, and since she was moving there when she was 18, she might as well start going there now.

Well, you can imagine this sat real well with us. (NOT!) However, we wanted to be adults about it and sit down with her and discuss it. However, Kayla was SUPER upset that we were not totally excited and willing to immediately sign the paper without even thinking twice. She got up, grabbed her paper, balled it up into a wad and started to leave.

Chris and I were really upset with her. What we wanted to do was sit down and create a pros and cons list for this change in schools. We also found out that this school she's asking to go to is a drop out prevention school. A last resort for kids who have been failing in the regular schools. Is that really supposed to be right for Kayla? She's now an honor roll student! They did tell her that she could graduate early. Because it's a dropout prevention school, they don't have to stick to the same rules/guidelines as regular schools. They don't have to have X number of math credits and English credits and so on in order to graduate.

So we argued a bit. Yelled a bit. Then talked for a long time.

This time Chris was much more upset about Kayla saying she was going to move out when she was 18. Last time we spoke, Kayla said she wasn't going to do this... now, she's telling us that she's not only going to move out, but that everyone knows all about it - including Julie.

Pause here for me to say how incredibly pissed off I am that Julie is going behind my back and making these plans with Kayla. FURIOUS. I am just FURIOUS with Julie over this. I don't know what to do about it. I want to punish her, but am not sure how to do so. Do I tell her she can't come over for visits for a while? That's what Katie says I should do. But the, for how long? Ooooooo it just makes me SO MAD. Okay - unpause.

So, we talk to Kayla about this whole thing. First thing we talk about is her grand plan of moving in with Julie. We talked about all kinds of things. Has she thought through that completely? How small Julie's apartment is.... high crime neighborhood.... what's going to happen when she gets manic or depressed and needs to go back into the hospital....

Then we talked about the school. Chris read all the requirements for the school. You have to agree to go into their work program after high school, meaning they place you into a job in your career field. And the career field isn't one that she's actually wanting to get into after high school. What about college? Well, since this school is DESIGNED for kids who are about to drop out of high school, they aren't college material. Kayla IS going to college. The whole school setup isn't right for her.

I created a pros and cons list with her help. The biggest things she had on her pros list was that she'd graduate early and that she'd be going to school with her boyfriend. The cons list however was quite long - that it was a drop out prevention school, she'd have to go into the career field, not college, she'd lose her friends, and that although it's a career oriented school, it doesn't have the career that SHE wants in it.

So, end result, we are not signing the paper. If she wants to move in with her mom in January and she wants to sign her up - go for it.

Then we created a pros and cons list for Kayla moving in with Julie. The only thing Kayla could give me for "Pros" was "I can do whatever I want" and "My boyfriend can sleep over". Two grand reasons I'd say... real mature. On the "Cons" list were: Mom's mental health-cutting/suicide attempts, snoring, being there when Julie has men over, it being a very SMALL apartment, high crime neighborhood, no privacy, leaving all her friends and sister and brother behind, the apartment is right NEXT to the pool (which has no hours people can't be in it), and changing schools mid-year.

I asked Kayla at one point.... if your dad were to come down for just a minute... and he was standing in our living room talking to you about all of this.......... WHERE would HE want you to live while you finished school? Then Chris asked her to answer honestly. She said he would want her to finish here. I know he would, I know he would be SO PROUD of her. He would NOT want her living at Julie's house just to push her buttons and seeing how much she can get away with. He knows that we have given her stability and fair yet firm discipline.

I don't honestly know anymore what Kayla is going to do when she's 18. I'm really trying not to care. TRYING.

I should run for tonight. Now that I have the laptop, I'll post a lot more often. I have so much more to catch you all up on. Kayla is going to court tomorrow to testify against what a police officer and the assistant principal of her school is going to say is true. This will take a while to blog about... but I'm tried tonight. I'll blog tomorrow on this one!

Please keep us in your prayers. Pray for Chris and I in particular, that we stay connected. We've had a bit of disconnect lately and could use some prayers in this area. Thanks!

Stupid Criminals

Sooooo.... Just another night in the Rhocchini house.

 

The kids are going to bed - late of course.  Nine-ish we are telling them to "go to bed".  Ten-ish we still hear them up but they are at least in bed, mostly asleep.

 

Eleven thirty on Sunday I decide to go to bed.  Chris is next to me - watching ESPN Sports Center something-or-another until he falls asleep. 

 

About 1:30 in the morning we hear yelling in the back yard.  Some guy is yelling "What did I do? Don't tase me!"   Our bedroom windows are really big and old - over 100 inches long and when the wind blows hard, they tend to move a bit... so hearing yelling isn't unusual if a neighbor gets rowdy.  But our neighbors are good normally.  We live in a quiet neighborhood - a dead end road off a dead end road... who would be outside yelling??

 

I open my eyes a bit and notice the red and blue flashing lights..... hmmm.... police lights?

 

Then I hear the pounding on the door....

 

Chris jumps up and throws on shorts - runs downstairs to find out what's going on.

 

I hear "Sir, we are with the City of Tampa Police.  We have a suspect in your back yard.  For your own safety, please stay inside. Thank you." 

 

I'm dazed. 

 

Confused.

 

Suspect?

 

Police?

 

In MY BACK YARD?

 

WHATTTTTT?????????????????

 

I throw on shorts and of course the FIRST place I go is out back. 

 

I'm still in a fog.  My contacts are dry.... I'm not sure I'm even really awake. 

 

I feel like I'm in an episode of Cops. 

 

I go onto the back porch where I see probably 8 City of Tampa police officers and a guy - mid to late 20's, white male, face down - on the ground.  An officer has his knee in his back holding him down on the ground.  The guy just keeps asking "What did I do?  What did I do?" 

 

I'm thinking to myself... how the HECK did he get in my back yard?  The police talk to him very little, which is just fine with me... he appears to be 'out of it'.  Not really drunk, but definitely impaired somehow.  Maybe drugs?  I dunno. 

 

I then hear the officers talking about how they can't find the weapon.

 

Weapon?

 

Yeah... they can't find the gun this guy used.  It's probably in our yard somewhere. They want to know if they can get to our shed - and of course I say yes. Chris is talking to them a lot more than I am.  I'm completely dazed and confused.  I just keep wishing I could go back to bed and wake back up.  There's really a gun out here somewhere?  Am I dreaming?   A couple of officers take flashlights and go to the shed... looking for a gun. 

 

To recap:  a bad guy is in my yard - 8 police officers are now looking for his gun. 

 

Oh

 

My

 

GOSH!

 

Well, come to find out.... this guy did something... we don't yet know what he did.  He left his car out by the road.... got out and ran. He then hid in a neighbors yard.  The police went looking  for him and he jumped the fence into OUR yard. 

 

The police couldn't find him. 

 

But - they had his cell phone number. 

 

......................Yes... the story gets more and more weird.  I know ~ I know.......................

 

So.... they call him.  His cell phone is ON.  It RINGS!  

 

Ring......

 

Ring...............

 

Ring........................

 

They follow the rings...... CATCH him in our yard.  Pounce on him.............. hold him down, and he says "What did I do? What did I do?"  And this is where I first saw him.  Laying on the ground with the police officer on his back. 

 

Unreal.

 

Stupid criminals.

 

They know ~ I'm supposing from 'whatever' he did that led to the police from the City of Tampa chasing him up to Hillsborough County (where I live) that he had a gun.  They assumed he hid it somewhere around our house, but they couldn't find it.  They asked us if we were to find it to leave it alone and call them (leaving us their phone number).  We looked the next day and didn't find anything. 

 

It was just a really ODD day, ya know? 

 

And not one of the kids woke up.  Not one!  They all slept through the whole ding-dang thing. 

 

Unreal.

 

Just thought I'd share with you all before I forgot the story... knowing that you would all NEVER believe it.  :o)

Weekend Update

The first thing I wanted to tell you is that Genetix - Jonathan and Chris's father-son Quartet with Arne and Paul - finished EIGHTH! Eighth in a field of 20! This was incredible! They were actually singing at a B level!

The top 10 are asked to come back and sing again the next night. They never expected to make the cut, they only had two 'contest' songs ready to sing. They made 'the cut' to sing the second night, and I drove up last Saturday to see them sing again. What an amazing thing... to witness such an amazing thing.

The funny thing was that they had to run out on Saturday to get an outfit to sing on stage with on Saturday night because they never anticipated making the cut. Also, one of their songs for the second night was not a contest song so it scored zero points. But even still.... they scored eighth. Way to go Genetix!

I wish everyone could share the bond that Chris and Jonathan shared that weekend. The memories.... memories that will last a lifetime for sure. Every man in that auditorium (and there were thousands of men there for the competition) wished that they had the chance to sing on the stage with their son - just once. Jonathan is young enough where Chris had the opportunity to do it once, and will have opportunities to do it again and again. What an amazing experience.

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We had a weird experience with Kayla this week. She got really MAD at me this week, for some reason. I can't really say 'why', for sure. On Monday, she was dating one guy. On Tuesday she sent me a message telling me that she had broken up with him because she had always loved this other guy. She thinks we really don't like the guy she's going back out with now.

Well, that's partly true, but not really. We like HIM - but we don't really like the two of THEM going out together. They've dated TWICE already in the past. The two times have ended badly.... once with him wanted to end his own life over the break-up and once with a physical assault (Kayla punching in the face). So..... yeah..... I'm thinking the two of them are just not the greatest together.

HOWEVER - the one thing I learned from my mom and from being a teenager in love myself and getting pregnant as a teenager is that - you can't tell a teenager who to date because they do the EXACT opposite. So -- I have always told Kayla that she can date whomever she wants to date.

Even though we haven't liked how the relationship ended with this boy... the boy himself isn't a bad kid. As a matter of fact... I like the kid. He's a good boy, and has a very a sweet soul.

But - long story short about this whole thing is that Kayla has it in her head that Uncle Chris and Auntie Tina hate this boy. After a long odd fight.... I mean.... a day and a half of not talking to each other.... we finally had a long talk.

In that talk we told her how we felt. She could certainly date him, we didn't mind at all. We wanted HER to be happy! Her happiness was our #1 priority.

The funny thing was that two days later I asked her when he was going to come over for dinner or just to hang out at the house. She said "You are going to allow him to come over the house? For real?" I said... "Were you even AT the meeting we had in your room Kayla when we talked about all of this?" She still thinks we hate him! OIE!

We also had a long talk about how she keeps stomping her feet and saying she's moving out when she's 18. She told everyone this time - including me - that "In 8 months when she's 18, she's moving out, but if she could move out right now she would!" I told her that she was not going to keep doing that to me -- she was not going to keep holding me emotionally hostage that way. That -- from now on, I'm perfectly okay with her moving out when she's 18.

I suppose her plan is to move onto her mommas sofa when she turns 18. She's going to pack up everything she owns and put it into a tiny, TINY apartment, change schools mid-year, and I suppose then she'll be happy. And -- if this will make her happy -- so be it.

But I'm not going to spend one more second of one more day worried about it.

I could blog about how I'm pissed that Julie would talk to Kayla about this. How Julie thinks this is the "right" thing to do. About how Julie thinks this is the "motherly" thing to do. But... that would be giving it more seconds out of another day... so I won't. :o)

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Heavy on my heart this weekend is the fact that Chris is on praise team..... I am not.

I have to figure out how I'm going to feel about this. How I'm going to sing and be happy about this. How I'm going to worship and be happy when inside I feel like crying. I don't know how to do that yet. I have a day to figure that out.

Chris is very excited about the new layout, and as his wife, I want to be supportive for him. I really do. It's just SO hard.

For those who don't understand, they went from 6 teams of singers... each team had about 5-6 people on it -- where we now have 2 teams of 6 -- 4 as 'back-up' singers with 2 worship leaders out front. So, a lot of people were cut with the new format.

I just hope I can make it through the service tomorrow. I'm going to pray about it today. It's not a pride thing for me. It's not that I'm sitting here thinking I'm better than someone - I don't care about that.

I'm sad.

I'm sad I'm not singing with Chris.

I'm sad I'm not singing more praise and worship because I enjoy it so much.

And of course I'm sad that I auditioned and I FAILED. That's a big one for me. I hate failing anything. I feel like a marked woman now. I feel like there's a big mark across me where everywhere I go everyone can see "oooo.... there's that girl who FAILED!!!" Ugg

Let's move onto a new subject, shall we??

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SCHOOL!

The kids are doing GREAT in school!

Even Jonathan has pulled up his grades and is now doing well. Let me tell you how they are all doing here with one month left of school:

Jonathan:
English: B
Spanish: C
Geometry: B
Science: C
American Govt: C
Semantics & Logic: A
Chorus: A

Kayte:
Medical Skills: B
Algebra: C
ROTC: B
Computer: B
Science: A
English: B
Reading: A

Kayla:
Math: B
ROTC: B
English: B
Reading: B
Science: B
History: B
Teachers Asst: A

Justin:
History: B
Algebra: B
Drama: C
English: B
Biology: B
Spanish: B
Wt. Training: A

Yes folks -- NO D's or F's..... NONE, and only 5 C's.... not too bad, huh? I'm just thrilled. They are all working SO HARD.

I just can't BELIEVE how much Justin's grades have shot up since he started his new medication, it's been unreal. It's making everyone else work harder as well. I'm so proud of each and every one of them.

I should run folks. It's almost 11:30 on Saturday and I've GOT to go do something with my day. I promise to blog some more in a bit... not wait a week - I promise!