I just couldn't go to bed tonight and not post. Thanks to the friends who have called today to check in on me... it means a lot. (Sorry Peggy, just got your message - too late to call!) Mom, Evie, Peggy, Michelle, Debi, Katie, Chris.... what a great support system I have.
I'm doing better today. All is not totally well, but I'm some better.
Julie has called me a lot today. Many times at work, and we were very busy today.... I just couldn't talk to her there. Plus she was slurring her words something horrible. But then she'd call just to make sure I wasn't upset, because I said I'd call her back later. She completely forgot one phone call we had late afternoon: I called her back and we talked about her weekly visit tomorrow night. She asked what I was cooking, what time she should come over, etc. But then only 2 hours or so later, she called me and didn't remember that phone call at all.
She's on some medication today, for sure. She SAID she's not. She's only on Soma (not one pill, no - no, she took three). Plus Ativan. Plus Tylenol and whatever else she had of her normal medication.
She called tonight and I listened in on the phone call to little Kayte. She'd say something to Kayte like "what period do you have ROTC?" Kayte would respond. Then another question later Julie would ask "what period do you have ROTC?" When she hung up, Kayte came over and asked me what was wrong with her mom. Again, she's slurring her words and it was difficult to understand her most of the time. And again, Julie thinks nothing is wrong with her.
Justin talked to her for a minute or less... then said he had to go. (He was outside with about 10 neighbors playing basketball.) He also asked me what was wrong with her... why she sounded so bad on the phone when he talked to her briefly earlier. (He had not yet talked to Kayte or myself about Kayte's phone call to their mom). It was then that I decided Justin should NOT talk to his mom tonight. He said he didn't want to talk to her when she was "like that", but that he didn't want her feelings hurt either - and if he didn't call her back her feelings would be hurt. Sigh..........
I should call Julie back and tell her Justin isn't calling. But I'm tired. Exhausted actually. And, I just don't WANT to deal with it right now, ya know? So... I'm not calling.
There is so much more to my night tonight... but I really am too tired to blog. Please pray for the visit tomorrow to be uneventful.
OH
WAIT
I have to tell you about that....
I did call Julie back after talking to Kayte about her mom. I called her and said "Julie, I do not want you doped up like this when you come over tomorrow. If you are going to be this bad, just don't come." She said "I'm not on anything, I'm fine." I told her that she was NOT fine. I said... "whatever the hell you took today, take LESS of it tomorrow."
Go me!!!!!
Okay, now I've got to run. Must shower. Maybe I'll go dip in the hot tub. But... it's just no fun all alone. I miss Chris..........
Hey Chris.... you know, the guy who reads my blog to know what's going on in my life.... the man who is working his buns off at a job on the beach so that he can keep the roof over our heads and our lights on... this is for you....
I didn't marry you because you were perfect.
I didn't even marry you because I loved you.
I married you because you gave me a promise.
That promise made up for your faults.
And the promise I gave you made up for mine.
Two imperfect people got married and it was
the promise that made the marriage.
And when our children were growing up,
it wasn't a house that protected them;
and it wasn't our love that protected them -
it was that promise.
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