Passed Audition

Okay, I can't BELIEVE it's taken me three days to post this....

I went to Toast of Tampa on Tuesday night for my second week. I auditioned, singing Alabamy along to a tape holding a tape recorder and Happy Birthday with three other parts in a quartet. I was SO NERVOUS, you just can't imagine. I think I had to start Alabamy 3 or 4 times... I kept messing up the words. Words? I knew this song from before - heck I can still do the choreography to it - why am I messing it up? I was nervous. I kept thinking to myself... I'm not good enough at Church... why am I here?? I tried to set those negative thoughts out of my head. Self-defeating. I know I am good at Barbershop singing. I can do this. So I actually held the recorder and did it with a little bit of choreography to help me remember the words, and got through it just fine. Not a lot of breath support because I was terrified, but good enough for a taped recording to get every note and breath right - not breathing in the 'no breath' spots and all that good stuff.

After rehearsal, the section leaders and director go into a room and listen to your tape. (No pressure) There they decide if you are good enough to go to the next step - the quartet. They asked me to come sing with the quartet, which I did.

And I PASSED!

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Now all I have to do is the choreography and pay my dues, and I'm in! So exciting!!

I come home every Tuesday night (err... Wednesday morning by the time I drag my butt home) and I'm just bouncing off the walls. It feels REALLY GOOD to feel so good about something for me. It doesn't feel 'selfish' or anything like it did before... it just feels............... right. It feels good. I feel... empowered. Happy.

Sigh............ :o)

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I probably should be a little more worried about singing in TOT without a 'job' -- given what is going on here with my job. But I'm not. I don't know why. I was talking to a friend of mine the other day at the grocery store, Ann (shout out - her husband reads my blogs every day!). She was saying how excited she would be - with the changes. Apparently she's used to changes like that. Me... who likes keeping jobs for a very long time and who's mom still lives in the house we moved to when I was 5 -- it's a bit more difficult to adjust to changes. But... I know that God provided me with this job and if He is moving me, He has good things in store for me. I'm really TRYING not to be terrified as I read the news about the lines of people looking for assistance who are well-qualified and just can't find jobs -- the statistics -- I instead try to remember that God has a plan as He always does and I must TRUST that plan. He will not let me down. He never has.

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Speaking of plans.... Kayla came home the other day telling us that her Guidance counselor at school told her that she could become a Senior THIS YEAR and that she could graduate in June, 2009. Kayla said it was because she had "enough credits".

This made NO SENSE to me. How could she POSSIBLY have enough credits? First of all, if Kayla does, then Justin does too because Justin is in advanced classes and Kayla is in -- well, we'll just call them 'not advanced' classes. Sure, Kayla is older and failed a grade, but that was FOURTH grade and has NOTHING to do with 'credits'. You begin collecting credits your in 9th grade. How does she have enough to graduate a year early?

She then tells me that she would have to take ONE class at Night School. Well... this raised a flag to me because of the last time she 'attended night school'. You know - she went one night and then the rest of the months she hung out with friends until 9:30 at night, coming home telling us she was just getting out of night school? Yeah.... not good.

Additionally, I had concerns about her scholarships. I am supposed to meet with a VA Counselor their summer year just before they go into their Senior year to apply for the GI Bill. Then... there are all KINDS of scholarships out there that kids can get when they are Seniors. It's now October. How many of those are now gone to the kids who have been Seniors all year already?

So, I told her I wanted to talk to her Guidance Counselor myself. She called me and told me that she had two concerns... one that Kayla told her last year that she really wanted to graduate with 'her class'. I didn't quite get that... she's been with these same group of friends since 4th or 5th grade. I'd think she would consider this 'class' her actual CLASS. Sure she's a little older, but she doesn't look it nor act it. Anyways....

Second was the fact that the school kinda frowns upon having 18 and 19 year olds on campus. See, if Kayte who is 15, gets into a fight and hits someone - she is suspended for 10 days. If Kayla who is 18 hits someone -- she can be arrested as an adult. The rules are different.

I told the counselor that -- while I understood her concerns, I was more concerned about Kayla making it to college. I explained the GI bill and scholarship stuff to her. She then told me that Kayla wouldn't really graduate in June... that she is actually three credits shy of graduating. Even IF she attended night school, she still needed two more credits. They would then send her to Gary Adult School.

An Adult School? Really??? So..... what would THAT look like on a college application?? I would think it wouldn't look so good!

She then told me that Kayla could graduate in December 2009... which would get her credits out of the way AND she'd still graduate early, which is what Kayla wanted. The only problem with that is that Kayla would miss all the really fun stuff of being a Senior... Pictures, Homecoming, Prom, Spring Break, Grad Night, and of course, the graduation ceremony.

I think I've talked her into sticking it out her full Senior year, but am not sure if she actually will. We'll see, it will be completely up to her - the best I can do is tell her what I believe is in her best interest and tell her what will happen if she chooses otherwise.

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Chris has been out of town yesterday and today. He took a job down in Ft. Myers or someplace like that.... too far to drive every day - so he got a $50 hotel room and is working the job away from home. We gotta do what we can, ya know? But the commercial jobs he's had are a true blessing at a time when the economic times have caused people to NOT want to work on their homes. For that, we are extremely thankful.

Chris just called me -- it's 4 pm and he's on his way home! Yeah! He wasn't sure if he'd be done early enough to come home today or he'd have to stay another day. I'm glad he'll be home tonight.

Maybe I'll run by my new favorite store that I can only shop for on nights like tonight - when the kids are going to be at Football and out for Friday night. Yes... I just discovered the Fresh Market. Oh my GOODNESS.... they have such GREAT food there! I mean, I can't feed a family of 6 there, but I can pick up dinner for Chris and I. :o)

Hey, speaking of things to be grateful for -- thank you to Gwen and to my boss at PERO Engineering who both pitched in money for Jonathan's trip to NY City for his chorus. Jonathan's chorus is going to NY City next year and they asked us to solicit donations. I guess I probably should have put that in my blog, huh? Well, donations are made out to "Gaither High School" and are to have his name on the checks so that they know it's for him. 100% of the money goes directly towards his trip. So, a big thank you to Gwen and Mr. Pero for doing that for us. If any of you are interested, let me know. I'm not sure if school donations are tax deductible - I'm assuming they are since the check IS made out to the school - surely that would be of some kind of tax benefit, huh? But I'm far from a tax expert - by a long-shot. LOL

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For those who have been keeping Jonathan in your prayers - thank you. I haven't really given a status update, but things ARE going better. He is acting and feeling better. He's been seeing the Psychiatrist, we see a family counselor once a week, and things are going well. Heck, my boy even has a girlfriend at school! Chris and Jonathan are working on their communication, and I am working on my discipline of Jonathan.

Speaking of which, I tried something Wednesday that worked VERY well. Jonathan has a tendency to talk 'down' to me. Treat me with TOTAL disrespect. If you could hear the way he talks to me sometimes, it would make your skin crawl. But I've allowed it for some time, mostly because I can tell he's really not - happy. Anyways....

I was talking to him about a couple of things. Actually - no - I was giving him what I THOUGHT was good news. More on that in a second. But in the middle of my TRYING to talk to him, he was nasty and pretty much told me "I'm too busy to talk to you". My blood boiled, I'd had ENOUGH of him talking down to me.

I told him that from now on - any time he mistreated me and/or talked disrespectful to me... I was going to go into World of Warcraft (the game he LOVES to play all day and night) and lock out a 30-minute time block. One time block each and every time he does it.

Parental controls are a wonderful thing.

With that, Jonathan shut off the computer game he was playing, turned his chair towards me and gave me his full attention. LOL -- Love it!

The 'good news' I had to tell him was that I managed to get him special permission to use HIS cell phone at school - but only to take notes and put in reminders and homework assignments. I talked to his Guidance Counselor, who talked to his Assistant Principal and I told them about his Aspergers (which they know about already). I told them that we got him the phone so that he could keep on top of things because his writing is not so good. Organizational skills are a weakness for him, part of his aspergers. Many other people with Aspergers, and books I've read, said to get a Palm Pilot or phone to help him keep up in school. We did - but with the new 'cell phone ban' -- he can't use it without the risk of having it taken away for 3 days.

They agreed that - if it'll help him with his organizational skills - they want him to use it. They gave him special permission to use his phone in school without the fear of it being taken away. As long as he isn't texting or calling friends. Good news! Yet Jonathan wasn't so receptive.

Anyways....

It's time for me to run... Chris is almost home and I've still got to get to the store. AND I just found out that Michelle is coming over for Dinner and the Rays game. Friday Night Party Night has RESUMED! (We call Friday nights "Friday night party nights" because we do something just for us - sometimes just involves us falling asleep on Michelle's sofa watching the Dog Whisperer... but still... it's for US and without kids!) So... YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEE

Please keep us all in your prayers!