Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Headaches

I'm so very tired of having headaches. I have the appointment with the Neurologist on Friday. It was supposed to be today, but they moved it to Friday. I've been keeping a log of the headaches... And here's what I've found out:

For the past 30 days I have had headaches for 20 of them. I logged taking 98 Advil over the course of those 20 days. (That is just what I've remembered to write down. There may be a few more.) Add to that Fioricet, Maxalt and Axert (all migraine pills) - not a lot of those, just what I happened to have on hand. To say I am READY to see the Neurologist would be an understatement.

Oddly I was nearly headache-free throughout my week's vacation. I don't know if it was because of a lack of stress (although it was still stressful... We spent a LOT of money there)... Or maybe it was the salty air and beach... Or maybe it was just coincidence given the time of the month it happened to fall on... Or maybe I should just incorporate Margaritas into my daily routine at home!! **grin** (I'm kidding mom, don't panic!!)

I do kind of feel like a hypocrite... Preaching to Julie about her overusing medication, and I'm taking upwards of 98 Advil in 20 days. However, I know it's different. I'm not popping Vicoden or Percocet, it's Advil. I'm trying to take medications that are specific for my headache, and logging when I've had them and what I was doing that may have triggered it. (By the way, I myself have not been able to identify any real 'trigger'.)

Julie came over for a visit last night and it really went very well. She wants spaghetti almost every time she comes over, and I've really gotten quite good at timing the dinner perfectly to make it all quickly and finish at the same time. Start the corn on high, ground the beef, preheat the oven. Then when the beef is done, add sauce - putting it on low, turn the corn down to medium and turn on the water. When the water begins to boil, put the bread in the oven, stir the sauce and throw in the pasta. 10 minutes later the bread, sauce and corn are all ready at the same time. :o)

For dessert we had pound cake with whipped cream topped with strawberries and blueberries. I'm really trying to show Julie that choosing somewhat healthy foods doesn't need to be icky all the time. :)

I have had two friends who called to offer to pitch in help with kid related supplies today. Michelle is brining lots of school supplies with her this weekend and Kaye is bringing something from Sam's (don't know if it's the gel/hair supply/body wash kinds of things she brought last time or what - but I'm sure it's going to be VERY helpful). Kaye also mentioned that her brother might like to help and she asked what he could do. Usually when someone offers in person or on the phone, I'm all like "oh, thanks but we are good!" I'm a wimp in person or on the phone. We could be starving and unless you read it in a blog you'd never know if we were just talking. But this time, I said I knew exactly what he could do. Jonathan needs school clothes. Jonathan and Kayte... Probably my two biggest clothes worries as we head into the new school year. So... I asked her her brother could do Target gift cards, that would be awesome. I don't know for sure that he will... But I am hopeful. I find people like Michelle, Evie, Kaye, James, and anyone else who just stepped up to help out in raising these kids.... I find folks like this fascinating. Angels is what they are. And not just them... Any of you who have kept us in prayer... Who have sent well-wishes our way... Who have asked God to help us through something -- you are all Angels as well. Chris and I have FELT the power of prayer and we thank those who help us in this way through our own prayers often.

I hope that one day, many many years from now, Kayla, Justin, Kayte and Jonathan can go back as adults - perhaps with their own kids - and read these blogs and know that it took a VILLAGE to help them become the amazing adults they turned out to be. Let it be said from my lips (errr... Fingers) right here and now that it was NOT Chris and I alone that turned these children around. GOD stepped in first and foremost, and I truly believe that He orchestrated everything from the beginning. From the first phone call, to the DCF workers, the judge, to the amazing people who stepped up like angels to help out from time to time. Chris and I deserve none of the accolades... God deserves every bit of thanks.

Speaking of God... He showed His sense of humor again this week. I... gosh... I shouldn't even tell you this. Sigh.......... I had made a 'deal' with God (yeah, I know I should not do that) about the kids social security money. I kept saying "God, if you made it arrive before *this* date, I'll give you (via the church) 10%." It didn't come and I upped it to 15%. Then 20%. I knew it would happen in God's time, not mine... But I think I felt a bit 'in control' by trying to barter with God. That sounds kinda funny to say it like that... But -- it IS exactly what I did, isn't it?

Well, the money came and none too soon. We were behind on bills... Electricity... Water... House payment... We were exhausted from the many things we have to deal with regarding Doug's things (of which I don't blog about much here)... I assumed the money would easily be spent in one or two little areas and I could give the rest to the church. It didn't work out that way. By the time we caught up on bills, set aside a little for the house tenting (which we have yet to do) -- there was VERY little left. Less than 5% actually. I did give that to the church. And of course I've been feeling guilty ever since.

I mean... Think about it... Making a deal with a family member or friend and not meeting the promise is one thing. Making a deal with a bookie and not meeting the promise might get your legs broken. What on EARTH could happen if your 'deal' was made with God and you couldn't live up to your promises??? Can you IMAGINE?

So... Yeah... I've been racked with guilt privately over this. Then Monday a printer/copier was GIVEN to me. Not just any printer/copier - this is a FANCY heavy-duty expensive one. I found the one UNDER This model (a 4000 series, mine is a 5000 series) sold NEW for over $10,000. Granted this is used - but I quickly thought I could make several hundred dollars minimum very quickly.

My FIRST thought was -- SELL IT!! SELL IT!! Then Chris (my voice of reason) stepped in and said... "Maybe you should see if someone wants it free first." Come on... FREE?????? Give it away?? First I thought he must have still been sleeping, but then I thought of the Church. You know, the one I didn't meet my promise of giving to. Sigh...

So... I emailed the church. Sure enough... They would love to have it. And the funny thing... I didn't put giving this printer together with my lack of a hefty enough financial gift to the church together until just now typing this blog.

Ah... God's sense of humor! Love that!! Do you think God will call us "even" now? Ha ha ha. Seriously... I do believe that IF He really did this for a reason... The reason would be that I would feel less guilt over it. I know that I am truly very hard on myself.

It's thundering yet again... Justin's game may very well be rained out AGAIN. Sigh... Poor Justin just wants to play his last game so he can officially say he is on the BEST baseball team in Tampa. I guess I'll find our shortly if we are going to be sitting at the baseball park all night or if we'll be home for the evening.

I kind of hope home. We are having a purse party at my house this weekend and I want to get it cleaned up. I also have to clean out the closet under the stairs that we keep all the cleaning supplies in as well as the school supplies. Time to make room for the school supplies once again. Fun fun.

I should run. Please keep all of us in your thoughts and prayers. My doctors appointment is Friday at about 10 in the morning... If you want to say a special prayer then, it would be great.

Happy moments, praise God.
Difficult moments, seek God.
Quiet moments, worship God.
Painful moments, trust God.
Every moment, thank God.

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